A short exert from a personal story.
My occupation would take me to many corners of the world and to begin a long distance relationship, let alone keep one was a very difficult task.
I am from a small country in the south pacific; New Zealand which is only a tree hour flight from Australia where among other countries spent most of my time working. This was in the early 80s before cell phones and the internet. Keeping my relationship going with my girlfriend back in NZ was a real mission at the best of times. “Snail mail” and dodgy telephone connections were all we had to stay in touch. After a while it was the old story, with me being away for so long we eventually drifted apart. My girlfriend found a new partner and me not long enough in one place to be able to begin a relationship. But hey, this was back in the 1980s and now days with the internet, Skype and cell phones, communication and staying in touch has never been easier.
Except perhaps for the physical side, a long distance relationship in our modern times is much easier to achieve, staying in touch and enjoying each other’s company.
There are many good dating sites now days that people can join, meet and potentially develop a relationship. This is an especially good option for a person in the position as I was, travelling a lot with my occupation.
It has become a very multi-cultural world now days and has become very common practice to dating each other from all corners of the world. Examples of this is Russian dating, Thai dating, Polish dating, Chinese dating to name a few.
There are a few points to remember however to make a long distance relationship a success. We have listed a few of these below.
Things to Think About and Do.
- Plan to meet: This is an important plan to make. Most people get time off at some point and it is especially good if you can plan your breaks to coincide at the same time. If the distance is long then perhaps plan to meet in “the middle” somewhere. Here you will be able to do all the things you couldn’t do while being apart, if you know what I mean. You will surely be excited and waiting in anticipation on your meeting.
- Always keep good channels of communication going: These days there really isn’t any excuse for not doing this as it was back when I was away so much in the early 80s. We have a great choice of communication now, cell phone, email, Skype, instant messaging and even satellite phone.
- Having a common interest: It is good when you both at have similar interests and hobbies. A long distance relationship would be very difficult if this was not the case. An interest on something online is ideal but an interest in a physical hobby is also important for when you are both together.
- Capture the moment: Capturing photos, videos and even audio recordings and sharing them with each other during your long distance relationship is a great idea. These days it is so easy to upload that type of media and email it. Even if one or both of you are in areas where there is no internet (not very common these days) snail main isn’t that slow.
- Surprise each other: Give inter flora a call and send flowers spontaneously. Send chocolates or anything else unexpected, it will keep the relationship alive and exciting.
The Do Not’s to Think About
- Don’t take things lightly: Don’t dictate or try to manipulate the relationship. Even though it is a long distance relationship you both have rights to make choices and decisions and doing this together is the best option. Even though you are both apart it is important to keep the relationship as you would a normal one. You both have the right to be treated with fairness.
- Don’t settle for a wait and see attitude: Having this wait and see attitude in a long distance relationship is a recipe for failure. For this to work you must both work together on it because if you don’t the relationship will surely fail. You must communicate and do the entire “do’s” above to keep this interesting and alive.
- Never, never settle for a temporary stand in: This will nearly always end in disaster. If you surely love each other, you wouldn’t want to do this anyway. By letting a third party into your life you will be putting your long distance relationship in mortal danger.
- Trust: Suspicion is not an option in a long distance relationship. You will need to learn to trust each other in a relationship like this. It would be a slippery slope to failure if either one of you began to be suspicious of the other. The bond would be broken and if your partner had a tendency to be unfaithful in a long distance relationship, they would do the same if you were physically together.
- Negativity towards long distance relationship: For this to work you need to have a positive attitude towards these sorts of relationships. Some couples think they will fail even before they have started. Don’t let your friends or any other person put you off.
In conclusion you must do what you feel is right. A long distance relationship can be successful and fun.